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UNDER A BLANKET (#SingingAsTheDarknessLifts 120)

 

UNDER A BLANKET  

 

This morning the air is simply cold. I am unable to detect anything other than cold and fresh. The fresh feels revitalising.

 

Alt text says this week’s photo is a person with a scarf behind her face. I say are you sure you want me to try to decipher that description. I also say it is me sitting on my chair with the blanket I have been spending a lot of time under lately. The blanket is a hexi-flat blanket made by my lovely wife from leftover yarn from a range of different projects. It holds the colours and memories of socks and blankets and shawls and jumpers. And this week it has helped me to be cosy and weighted during a week that featured a persistent sore throat and general feelings of yuckiness.

 

Progress measures this week have included three distinct stages of biscuit thoughts:

1.    Actively disliking the thought of a biscuit.

2.    Not wanting a biscuit, thank you.

3.    Wanting a biscuit even though I wouldn’t be able to taste it.

 

It has felt important to listen to my body this week. On Tuesday it was firm and persistent in telling me to go back to bed because Tuesday was definitely having a false start. It often told me that the blanket was a very good idea. And later in the week came the wonderful sign that I was shaking off the virus when, even though I couldn’t taste my food, I knew that having chocolate wheaty things with cold soya milk was exactly what I wanted for my breakfast. I hadn’t bought any for months before thinking about them this week. My body was telling me what I needed or perhaps it was me channelling my nan who always said, “a little of what you fancy does you good”.

 

It's been a long time since I have needed painkillers for six days in a row and I did a lot of talking to myself about this during the week. Lots of words about needing to be patient and wait for things to pass. Reminders to myself to look for the joy in those glimmering moments when putting the washing on felt doable, when different drinks soothed my sore throat in different ways, and giving myself a gentle cheer of encouragement when I had the desire to pick up a book and read.

 

In amongst the resting to recuperate elements of my week, I also had the wonderful joy of being invited to be a guest on a podcast. I loved so much about this... the being asked, the feeling of being recognised as having something to say, the thinking about what we might talk about and then the absolute joy of being in the moment of the conversation. I was able to hear myself think out loud and there was laughter, and those are truly lovely things to be gifted when you share time with someone. 

 

This week I hope you find plenty of shiny things that bring you joy, and I offer you a poem for Valentine’s Day:

 

Three Lies and One Truth About a Banana

after Henry Normal

 

It’s a telephone and someone is ringing for you.

It’s a smile.

It’s a sad mouth.

I do not love bananas, but I do love you.

 

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